This Most Unbelievable Life!

Episode 79 - Anxiety and the Stories we Tell!

Hello listeners! One of the things that we notice when we talk to folks, when we talk to each other, when we're in groups having a chat, or even when we're alone in our own thoughts and experiences, stories seem to be at the center of everything! We tell stories about ourselves; we tell stories about each other. Story serves many functions: it works as news, as gossip, as a way to bond, and even as a way to disagree with each other. For whatever reason, with us as a species, there is something about the story that lies at the heart of who we are, what we do, and even how we see and define ourselves. Which brings us to the topic of...
Anxiety.
As educators, we encounter anxieties in our students, in our colleagues, and in ourselves, all the time. Most of what we think we see around us every day is mediated by us all trying to have our needs met, and finding freedom from our anxiety can be a big part of those needs. In this episode, we talk through anxiety as we've known it, as we experience it, and what we do in times when it seems to rear up a little. We hope you enjoy listening to this one as much as we did recording it! Let us know what you think.
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Episode 78 - What is Fear?

So, folks… fear.
Fear is a big one! When we look around, we might see it, or signs of it, everywhere. Why do people do so many of the destructive things that they do? What is the basis for all of the political discord we see in the world today? Why do we feel like it’s so dangerous to go outside, or to a social event, or to a school or campus? Why do things feel so… scary? Sometimes, we assure you, some of these fears are quite real and bubble up in us for good reasons! One of the examples that Paul often brings up is that it’s fearful to go 100 MPH on the highway… for good reason! Fears can keep us alive. Fear can keep us safe. Fear is a response to things observed, in the context of who we see ourselves to be - and what we see as being our human limitations!
Fear, if nothing else, is informative.
So what are you afraid of, and why? When fear arises, what does that tell you about yourself, your history, your daily reality, your image of yourself, your values, and the things that you hold to be important?  What, after all, is there to be afraid of unless you have something to lose, and what do your fears tell you about what you find to be important? Maybe the point of all of this fear exploration isn’t so much getting rid of fear or even finding ways to power through fear. Maybe the thing to do right now is to notice our feel and how it rises to our awareness. it’s just one of the many reflections and vibrations of who we are right now, the life we have lived, and the experiences that have shaped us into who we are. Are some fears “irrational”? Well, maybe. So what if they are! They can still feel real- even if we can’t explain our fears to the person next to us. We’re all wired and experienced a little differently. 
Except with heights, the dentist, and worms. Paul thinks those are always rational fears! While Cheri’s starting to think most fears are constructed…even though that doesn’t make her fearless! Not in the least!
Enjoy the episode, folks! Let us know what you think!! 
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At long last, the newsletter is ALIVE!!! If you’d like to get the Official TMUL Newsletter in your email inbox each and every month, click on the link below and sign up! All sorts of nifty tidbits in there in the months to come, including some guided meditations. Here’s the link!
https://www.thismostunbelievablelife.com/newsletter
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We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 77 - Ligers and Tigons, Oh My!

This week we’re releasing something a bit different, folks! Different... but we hope you’ll find it useful, no matter who you are!  What we have here is actually a recording of a presentation Cheri gave with her professional academic hat on. She gave a plenary talk at Old Dominion University's Annual Spring Conference on the Teaching of Writing on April 16, 2021. This talk was aimed toward educators, specifically, writing faculty, but we think there are a lot of nuggets in it for everyone. 
At its heart, this talk is about how we choose our way of being in the world. Cheri talks through some of her own experiences shifting from a human doing to a human being. She offers that there is as much to unlearn in pursuit of a wonderful life as there is to learn. Where are we to begin when we feel called in so many competing directions that simple survival feels like the best we might hope for? This presentation looks to nature for lessons to guide the way. While most of the species we share this earth with seem to accept the realities of the seasons and allow themselves to live within (or have no means to resist) that cyclical flow, we humans manufacture our preferred conditions. Together, Cheri invites us to imagine a path that considers how we manufacture our spaces and that makes space to embrace the cyclical nature of our world, ourselves, and our work in the world. 
What do you believe it would take to live your most unbelievable life?  What would you need to unlearn to set yourself on that path? No matter your industry or way of being in life, we suspect you might have a thing or two about your way of being that’s come along for the ride and just isn’t serving you, or your most unbelievable life, anymore. We’d love to hear how you might apply some of Cheri’s observations to your own context!
We hope you’ll listen and connect with us after! 
A couple of notes for context: At the start of the presentation Cheri references Dr. Kevin DePew, her dissertation director, who provided her introduction just before the recording began. While Cheri does a pretty good job talking through content she puts on her slides during presentations, you might like to follow along with her slide deck on your own as you listen. And finally, she uses the acronym WPA throughout her discussion, which is shorthand for writing program administration or writing program administrators, depending on the usage! With those notes: now you’re an insider and ready to give it a listen!
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At long last, the newsletter is ALIVE!!! If you’d like to get the Official TMUL Newsletter in your email inbox each and every month, click on the link below and sign up! All sorts of nifty tidbits in there in the months to come, including some guided meditations. Here’s the link!
https://www.thismostunbelievablelife.com/newsletter
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Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 76 - How We Identify

Welp, as the title pretty clearly states, this is a conversation about how we identify ourselves, and each other, and what that does to us. At the beginning of just about every episode, and for no real reason that we ever thought too deeply about, we refer to each other as, “Dr. Spiegel,” and “Dr. Fitzgerald.” This, of course, is not what a lot of folks these days mean when they talk about identification. This titular example here is just what is called, “honorifics,” the titles that we call ourselves and each other in context. Although not as deeply personal as other possible identifiers, such as those regarding sex, gender, and other preferred pronouns, it does provide an entry point into a conversation into these deeper, less contextual  levels of identification, along with all the uncomfortable stuff that a lot of folks don’t really talk too much about in those conversations. 
What happens when we are referred to using an identifying descriptor that we really don’t love, or that just flat out doesn’t describe who we see ourselves to be at all? How do we clear that preference, or that reality, up with folks, despite the fact that doing so may cause some distress to them, to us, to everyone? Our answers may be imperfect, but we take a start at it, and we’d love to hear what you think!
Thanks for listening folks! 
This Most Unbelievable Newsletter Signup!
At long last, the newsletter is ALIVE!!! If you’d like to get the Official TMUL Newsletter in your email inbox each and every month, click on the link below and sign up! All sorts of nifty tidbits in there in the months to come, including some guided meditations. Here’s the link!
https://www.thismostunbelievablelife.com/newsletter
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Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 75 - There Is No Back!

 
After a couple of weeks of summer travel and the logistical challenges of coordinating recording times, we’re back to our regular routine! A normal podcast recording session, and a return to the comfort of doing things in ways that we’re familiar with for quite some time! 
Those words in bold face type above…. Yeah, we’ve been hearing those words quite a lot lately, haven’t we? Examples include, “going back to the office,” “getting back to normal,” and for some of us educator folk, “return to campus.” While there’s no shortage of talk and type spent these days on what emerges “post-pandemic,” and how, and when, we can use those temporarily abandoned office spaces and campuses, there is deeper, more personal conversation to be had just surrounding the use of these words and phrases - going back, return to normal, and return to...well, any place! In some ways (or maybe in many ways!) these phrases seem to us… regressive, and we’re beginning to realize that using them to describe what might happen can have a way of limiting the potential of new ways of doing things. 
For example, “going back into the office,” if we just take that word, “back,” out of there, it just becomes, “going into the office.” Trivial semantics? Maybe. Tiny detail? Maybe not! Back, return, and especially “normal” have a way of implying that this pesky pandemic was a blip in the system, and we can all just sort-of forget about it and get on with our lives. What emerges as we re-enter shared spaces, however, might be a little trickier than that, and there is potential here, as we do re-enter these spaces, to examine and drop, or at least carefully consider, some habits that may not have been serving us before, and to adopt some new ways of being, and operating with spaces and others, that may have been long overdue.
Check this one out and let us know what you think!
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Episode 74 - Can Flexibility be Part of the Plan?

Now you see, there are plans that we can make, and everybody loves a plan, right? There’s comfort in knowing what is going to happen, at least approximately; it can feel fantastic! This knowing can provide a sense of safety: we can prepare for it, we can set some expectations on when, where, and how things might progress, and we can see it as a sign that we must be doing something right. Making plans, regardless of whether they’re long-term or short-term, is, in a way, the definition of predicting the future. We speak into the universe: “This is what I’m going to do. This is how it’s going to go. This is the future I’m going to build with it, and LET’S GET STARTED!!!”
FACT – very few of our plans actually work out like we hope that they will.
A great philosopher, boxer Mike Tyson, once said, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.” So often, at the first sign of something not quite going as expected, the whole thing can come off the rails. To have a plan, and achieve satisfaction, is to accept some flexibility in how that might go, and how the whole business might unfold. What is it like to actually have a plan, and build some flexibility into the plan, while at the same time, reserving the right to change it if it ever starts going wrong, without the whole thing coming apart? It seems like walking a tightrope for sure, and in this episode, we talk it through and compare how we walk that line with our own plans.
Very few things ever go exactly as planned. Yet, here we are! Find out how, honor your resiliency, and let us know what you think of this one!
For a Deeper Dive...
TMUL’s own Dr. Cheri Spiegel just posted an awesome blog on seeing who shows up, and recognizing what they bring with them. You can check that out by clicking HERE! It’s a good one!!!
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Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 73 - Clean Out your Fridge!

Hey all! Well, that’s a curious title for a podcast episode, isn’t it??? Cheri hopes you read it with the cadence of this seemingly unrelated (but perhaps quite parallel) Monty Python skit.  So what's hanging out in your fridge? Is it all full of life and potential? Or has much passed its prime?
Dedicated listeners may have noticed that recently we’ve seemed more like a cooking / food podcast as much as anything else! Food analogies have been running rampant on this show, and that may be for a couple of reasons: the varieties of foods that are available throughout the summer, the seasonality of moving from cool weather into warm, and, of course, Paul’s garden has been talked about at least once per episode these days. In this episode, we don’t focus on a recipe or a cultivation aspect as we have been; rather, in this episode, we take on the complexities of your refrigerator - both your literal one, and, of course, your metaphorical (or metaphysical?) one!
So what do you have in your refrigerator, how did it get there, and what is your plan for it? Will those items be used or enjoyed one day soon, as intended? Or is are a few things soon to be unceremoniously tossed in when it becomes clear that their purpose in your life has expired and they must meet their fate in the bin? Also, and this is the big one that we tackle in this episode, are items taking up space that you would rather use for something else? In this one we think through how we often hang onto things that might prevent us from being able to use coveted and limited space in our life.  Are we hanging onto the old instead of making room for something more life-nourishing? Also, of course, we want to acknowledge that you can always just use that new space reclaimed from a good fridge-cleaning for…. Nothing! Maybe it’s ok to have a fridge with space in it, unclaimed and uncluttered. Embrace that spaciousness!
When might you do this fridge cleaning? Paul thinks that July 1 is a good day to do it, and he explains why that date makes sense in this episode! Check it out, and let us know how this one lands!
P.S. - There is mention of an upcoming blog post from Paul in this episode… stay tuned!!! Coming soon to a webpage near you!
For a Deeper Dive...
TMUL’s own Dr. Cheri Spiegel just posted an awesome blog on seeing who shows up, and recognizing what they bring with them. You can check that out by clicking HERE! It’s a good one!!!
Social Media Links
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Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 72 - We're Still Talking about Shepherd's Pie!

Episode 72 - We're Still Talking about Shepherd's Pie!
Shepherd’s Pie… or is it Cottage Pie… Paul’s still not entirely sure exactly what the distinction is, but Cheri knows it has something to do with a choice of meat. What we both do know is that it’s usually not an item baked in an oven in the middle of Summer when it’s over 90 degrees outside. Shepherd’s Pie is more of a fall / winter comfort food. So what does it mean when we feel the urge for this crap up in the warmer months, and does it mean that we’re looking for comfort? It’s not unreasonable, right? With all of this reopening, and with vaccinations rates increasing (hopefully!), there seems to be an air of celebration and relief as we confront the phrase, “back to normal.” However, it’s hard to ignore the curious anxiety that arises when the realities of reopening come into focus. When the pandemic began, comfort, and the difficult changes that came with it, called for comfort where it could be found, however it could be found. What does comfort look like now that there is a push to reopen our society, and where will new kinds of comfort be called for? What are the discomforts that will arise or are already popping up?
In this podcast, we talk through some of the things we’ve noticed with the increased reopening of the communities we live in, and not all of them are easy and comfortable! We’re not just talking about going into a crowded concert venue here… We’re talking about walking into the grocery store without a mask on! Eye contact with a stranger… what’s that??? When the pandemic started, the changes that we made were around long enough to create new habits and expectations of human interaction. What happens when we change those again? Are we up for a new, new normal? Take a listen to this episode, and let us know where you find your discomfort in this calculus.
But this is really just a conversation about Shepherd’s Pie, right? 
For a Deeper Dive...
TMUL’s own Dr. Cheri Spiegel just posted an awesome blog on seeing who shows up, and recognizing what they bring with them. You can check that out by clicking HERE! It’s a good one!!!
Social Media Links
Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Email
Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 71 - Well THAT Didn't Go Well!!!

Paul and Cheri recorded a podcast commercial!!! 
As much as we would like to announce that it went great and that it’s ready for deployment, we have to admit... it did not go as planned. Part of the reason why that might be because, well, it wasn’t planned! So much of what we do comes naturally, spontaneously, with flow, purpose, and ease, we thought, well, this probably will as well… let’s give it a shot!
Many, many takes later, we started to realize that we might have to come back to this. Then came the introspection - what were we doing wrong, and what does it all mean? This episode is about exactly that. When something like this doesn’t go as planned, and rather than success, all you’re left with is some frustration and doubt, what is going on there? Why didn’t that thing that we were trying to do work, and could we have predicted that? Were there signs that we might have missed? What combination of events and circumstances went into that happening, and that outcome? Check out this episode and see if you relate! We’ve all had times when we tried to do something, and it just didn’t work out. Here is our story about that time we tried to record a commercial! 
Outtakes may be posted soon!
For a Deeper Dive...
TMUL’s own Dr. Cheri Spiegel just posted an awesome blog on seeing who shows up, and recognizing what they bring with them. You can check that out by clicking HERE! It’s a good one!!!
Social Media Links
Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Email
Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife

Episode 70 - What is Cultivation?

Hi listeners! There’s this funny word that gets used quite often, more specifically in gardening, and more broadly and generally in the context of self-reflection, contemplation, and wellness, that Paul had always found curious. That word is “cultivation.” When we cultivate the garden, that looks like one thing, and there is a tool for that. What does it mean to cultivate in the context of self? What does that look like, and what is really going on when we do it? Cultivating? For what? Is something going to grow if we prepare and tend to ourselves?
So that’s what this episode is about - the practice of cultivation. As you might imagine, this requires a bit of honest self-reflection, some intentionality, maybe a dash or two of discipline, and, maybe even the courage to imagine your cultivated self, fully tended, bearing the fruits of this courageous work.
What do you need to get started? Now, let’s take an honest and compassionate look at those weeds. What is the work to be done here?
For a Deeper Dive...
For a recent blog on cultivation : https://www.thismostunbelievablelife.com/blog/cultivator
Also, Cheri just recently published a piece in the journal Teacher-Scholar-Activist which perfectly exemplifies cultivation, and how it can play out in someone’s life. Check that one out by clicking HERE.
Paul’s Cultivator of Choice : https://www.lowes.com/pd/CRAFTSMAN-Wood-Handle-Cultivator/1000752676
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Support the Podcast!
We'd love your support! If you would like to help out, here is the link to our Patreon site: https://www.patreon.com/thismostunbelievablelife